Mom of two Mischievous Monkeys: I was looking at my to-do list all wrong!

Wednesday, November 6, 2019

I was looking at my to-do list all wrong!

Like most families, we lead a busy life with work, home, school activities, and appointments. I try to keep organized with our google calendar and making reminder notes in my phone.  

I thought that having a to-do list was a good idea so that my Mom brain didn’t forget about things.

What I did not realize until recently is that while a to-do list can be a good thing it’s not helpful if you start to look at it the wrong way.


I didn't realize that I was actually setting myself up for negative thoughts that impact my well-being. 

I found myself being stuck in the thought process that if I did not complete the items on my to-do list that I had failed.  

I could only see the things starting back at me that I had not managed to cross off my list for that day.

We usually are our own worst enemies.

Sometime over the last few months I realized that if I looked at my to-do list in a different way it would improve my well being.

This probably coincided with the timing of forgiving myself more.

I was used to forgiving others, but could be especially hard on myself in thinking that I did not live up to my own (unrealistic) expectation for needing to accomplish everything at once.  Superhero syndrome is legitimately a thing.

I started to tell myself that it was okay if I didn’t get around to EVERYTHING  on my to-do list that day. If kids homework took longer and meant something else didn't get finished it's okay - plans can change and it's not the end of the world. Too tired to email your kids teacher - leave it till tomorrow and go get some sleep.

I began to look at my to-do list at the end of the day and focus on celebrating what I had accomplished rather than beating myself up over what I didn’t do.

I also made sure to designate a time in the evening when I would STOP trying to finish all the things - and take some time for me. Take a bath and read or book, watch a show with my husband, head to bed early or chat online with a friend. Some nights I work on my paint by number kit I received from Winnie's Picks (it was made based on a picture I sent that my husband took and I can’t wait to share the finished product)

So hang up that imaginary superhero cape and forgive yourself for not being able to accomplish everything. It’s not realistic and as I’ve learned it's not healthy.

Tara 


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